Unfortunately, the Electric Scooters Are Fantastic

Unfortunately(ˌənˈfôrCHənətlē), the Electric(iˈlektrik) Scooters(ˈsko͞otər) Are Fantastic

But can they succeed(səkˈsēd) despite(diˈspīt) their essential(iˈsenCHəl) dorkiness?

By Robinson Meyer

They would understand my plight(plīt) in Old Europe(ˈyo͝orəp). In ancient(ˈānCHənt), barbaric(bärˈbarik) days when local vassals(ˈvasəl) managed(ˈmanij) petite(pəˈtēt) armies, brute(bro͞ot) knights(nīt) often swept into villages(ˈvilij), declaring the inhabitants(inˈhabitnt) subject to new laws and new lords before riding(ˈrīdiNG) off again with the changing of the season.

When this latest army invaded(inˈvād) my village, it seemed no different than the rest. I had heard rumor(ˈro͞omər) of it for weeks, had feared and resented(riˈzent) it, had assured(əˈSHo͝ord) friends that its occupation(ˌäkyəˈpāSHən) would end as soon as all its predecessors(ˈpredəˌsesər,ˈprē-). But when its foot soldiers(ˈsōljər) finally arrived(əˈrīv), I was shocked to find myself charmed(CHärmd). Now, I cannot imagine life without them.

I speak, of course, of the electric scooters.

But I’m getting ahead of myself. It was not rumor exactly that first warned me of these conquerors(ˈkäNGkərər), but The New York Times. Months ago, its heralds(ˈherəld) announced that electric scooters had overtaken cities across California(-nēə,ˌkaləˈfôrnyə). These vehicles(ˈvēəkəl,ˈvēˌhikəl) looked like the Razor(ˈrāzər) scooters of yore(yôr), though they had small, zippy(ˈzipē), battery-powered engines(ˈenjən). You could rent one with your smartphone; ride it down the street, around the neighborhood(ˈnābərˌho͝od), or across the city; and then get off, tap your smartphone, and walk away. They cost about $3 per ride.

They were a public menace(ˈmenəs), that much was clear. A certain kind of young man—the type who might bring a Wi-Fi-enabled(enˈābəl) water bottle(ˈbätl) to the climbing(ˈklīmiNG) gym(jim), say—could be spotted(ˈspätid) whirring(wər) atop(əˈtäp) them. In a mad bid(bid) for market share, the start-ups behind the scooters had dumped thousands of them on city sidewalks, frustrating(ˈfrəsˌtrāt) San Francisco’s cyclists(ˈsīk(ə)list) and terrorizing(ˈterəˌrīz) its wretched(ˈreCHid) NIMBYs(ˈnimbē). A worrying story, certainly, but the threat(THret) seemed distant until this April(ˈāprəl) when I spotted a scooter in my neighborhood in Washington, D.C. Hoofing(ho͝of,ho͞of) it to the subway(ˈsəbˌwā) one morning, I caught its silhouette(ˌsilo͞oˈet) out of the corner of my eye: unused, teetering(ˈtētər), a putrescent(pyo͞oˈtresənt) green. Immediately(iˈmēdē-itlē) I despised(diˈspīz) it.

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http://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2018/05/electric-scooters-are-the-cargo-shorts-of-transportation/561440/