How to be a better friend

How to be a better friend

By Tara Parker-Pope

Whether it’s Mary(ˈmerē) and Rhoda, Woody and Buzz(bəz) Lightyear, or the 20-somethings of “Friends,” Hollywood(ˈhälēˌwo͝od) has long celebrated the power of friendship. And with good reason. A true friend gives support without judgment, comes through in a crisis(ˈkrīsis) and knows just the right thing to say when it matters most. Friendships are an essential ingredient(iNG-,inˈgrēdēənt) in a happy life, so it’s time to give them the care and attention they deserve. Keep reading to learn why friendships matter, how to sustain(səˈstān) them and the simple steps you can take right now to be a better friend.

The Benefits of Friendship

Family relationships often come with a dose(dōs) of guilt(gilt) and obligation(ˌäbləˈɡāSH(ə)n). Friends, on the other hand, are the antidote(ˈan(t)iˌdōt) to the burdens of daily life.

Friends Share the Load(lōd)

How powerful is friendship? Researchers at the University of Virginia(vərˈjinyə) wanted to find out whether friendship influences how we approach the challenges of daily life. In an unusual experiment, researchers stood at the base of a steep(stēp) hill (a 26 degree incline(inˈklīn)) on the university campus(ˈkampəs) and asked 34 students as they walked by to help them in an experiment. Some students were by themselves; others were walking in pairs.

Each student was given a backpack filled with weights equal to about 20 percent of their body weight. While the students may have had the impression they were going to have to climb(klīm) the hill, the researchers simply asked them to estimate(ˈestəˌmāt) how steep the climb would be.

Notably(ˈnōdəblē), students standing alone perceived(pərˈsēv) the hill slant(slant) as steeper and thought it would be harder to climb while carrying the weighted pack. But students who were standing next to a friend thought the hill looked easier to climb and gave lower estimates of its steepness. Interestingly, the longer the two friends had known each other, the less steep the hill appeared.

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https://www.nytimes.com/guides/smarterliving/how-to-be-a-better-friend